10) Sugar is good.
9) Artificial energy is green.
8) Caffeine is life before recess.
7) Gum disease grows the economy.
6) Liquid candy cigarettes boost test scores.
5) Mountain Dew is a mineral.
4) Pepsi tones abs.
3) Coke is sold over the counter.
2) Soda looks and tastes like shale water.
1) We need more fat kids, the Chinese are catching up.
Photo by Guillermo Santangelo
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